Survivor David vs. Goliath: Corinne Kaplan won’t offer a Brutal Cast Assessment

Screengrab via CBS
Screengrab via CBS /

A modern staple in Survivor coverage, Corinne Kaplan cites a number of reasons why she won’t provide her Brutal Cast Assessment for David vs. Goliath.

There are countless great outlets for where you can get quality Survivor coverage. In addition to our own features, you can always listen to Rob Has a Podcast video/audio coverage, the Survivor Specialists, the Purple Rock Podcast and a ton more. Most people are cordial with their player assessments. Most people don’t dig deep into players’ character traits or be meanspirited.

Most people aren’t Corinne Kaplan.

The two-time player from Survivor Gabon and Caramoan made her presence known on the show by never pulling punches, often sharing pointed barbs and downright brutal insults. Her sharp banter brought flavor to a contentious season in Africa and extends it to her podcast, All The Fixins, as well as offering a Brutal Cast Assessment for Rob Cesternino right before each season airs.

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Unfortunately, the Survivor roastmaster extraordinaire will hang up the binder for David vs. Goliath. As discussed in her latest podcast entry, there are a number of factors going into this decision, the least important being that she doesn’t live in California anymore. She insists she would fly in and hang out with Rob and Nicole Cesternino if not for mitigating factors.

Chief among them is the incredibly short lead time from CBS in releasing the official cast of Survivor: David vs. Goliath. Instead of a full month, the show released the bios and photos three weeks ahead of the premiere, cutting down the research time put into making scorching hot burns, as well as scheduling a flight to LA and back from Colorado.

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Whether or not you appreciate Corinne’s devilishly crass, blunt, hilarious style of comedy aside, she does have a unique perspective on the ins and outs of production and the people who play Survivor. I’m not sure if there’s any other castaway who could come close to providing a similar perspective on current players while being authentic or as dark, and it’s a shame to miss out on a wholly different voice for David vs. Goliath.