Survivor retro rewatch: Gabon episode 2, “She Obviously Is Post-Op!”

Survivor isn’t supposed to be a time capsule into the social norms and conventions of the time, but the title of Gabon’s second episode says otherwise.

I was waiting and waiting throughout this follow-up episode to the premiere to see who exactly said the titular line for the second episode of Survivor Gabon. I had to know who of the very likely players to say something like this would actually say it. Apparently, the line was cut from the episode (for good reason), but it’s still the official production title approved of by CBS back in 2008. What a difference a decade can do.

It’s funny looking back at pre-season cast assessments and seeing how different the perception is compared to the reality. Ahead of Survivor Gabon, I thought that Crystal Cox would have to tone down her physical prowess to avoid getting picked off as a challenge threat. Turns out, the only two challenges she ever wins in the season come from this episode. Blink, and you’ll miss it!

The season was about strife at camp, and with G.C. and Randy throwing barbs at each other and Ace pretending he’s the lord of the Kota tribe to Paloma’s chagrin, there always seems to be drama. Even though Fang is flailing for dear life, it’s Kota opting to sit out stronger players for the Reward Challenge to prevent an Immunity Challenge imbalance that even gets Fang through the door to a win in the first place.

It led to one of the most hilarious face-offs in Survivor challenge history. To win blankets and comfort, teams would take turns going up two versus one in hopes of dragging the opposing tribe member off a pole and drag them across a line some distance away. Because Ace got it into everyone’s head that the strong players should wait out for Immunity, we had a situation where five-foot, small Paloma was on the pole and had to hold strong against Randy and Crystal.

Not only did they pull her off right quick, Randy emphatically told her she was done before he and Crystal lifted her off the ground and carried her to the finish line. Oddly enough, the only time I can remember such a bad matchup was when Randy had to face off against James Clement in a literal shoving match.

Anyways, the Fang tribe finally won a thing! Because Exile Island was an inexplicable thing during Survivor’s teen years, Sugar was chosen to be sent there and opted to search for the Hidden Immunity Idol. Instead of digging it up on a small island she would have been stuck on if this was Cook Islands, she was sent on one of the greatest idol adventures the show had seen.

You see, after seeing the full edit for Survivor Gabon, the producers had to know that they had to force characters for the fans to root for, and they helped pick Sugar as such a character as she searched for this idol. She knew how to read the clues (unlike Dan Kay in the last episode) and dug up the second clue in a crater beyond the lake.

That led her to a “one tree hill,” which pointed her to “beneath the burnt wood,” which directed her to a tree “among the limbs that reach skyward.” It was on this journey that Sugar opened up about growing up as a person through Survivor after her father passed away shortly before participating.

Her arc in Survivor Gabon is certainly an interesting one, and definitely gave credence to the possibility of this season finally having someone to cheer for! Of course, that’s a lot of qualifiers, as she returned to Kota as a pawn for Ace to try to take out a dissenting voice.

Which leads us to the Immunity Challenge, which is best described as “Slip-N-Slide Puzzle Fun.” Players would fling themselves down the slide in order to grab numbered pieces for a logical math problem. The numbers would end up creating a lock combo that could unlock a tribe’s immunity win.

It ultimately boiled down to the intelligence of two different types; Ken’s street smarts (non-academic gaming) and Bob’s book smarts. “The sum of both end values equals the sum of the middle two, the last is equal to the second minus the third and is one less than its only neighbor” was the clue read out to them on a tablet.

Survivor Gabon episode 2 — Screengrab via CBS

Of course, in our infinite time to logically parse things out, you can find clues immediately that help determine the rest of the puzzle. But after repeated attempts, Ken beat out the physics teacher and won Fang tribal immunity. Sugar’s reaction above says it all!