We all knew that a tribe swap was coming in Survivor 50 episode 3, "Did You Vote for a Swap?" We even knew who was going to end up on the new tribes. But, Jeff Probst had an epic twist up his sleeve at the beginning of the new episode.
Jeff decided that, instead of going with his tried and true method of "Drop your buffs! We're changing tribes," or some variation of that, he was going to rap the tribe swap instructions this time. And, it's one of the worst things we've seen this season so far.
For me, Jeff's rap has to be up there with Christian Hubicki pooping his pants on camera and Kyle Fraser tearing his Achilles tendon as the worst thing I've seen in Survivor 50 so far. In fact, it might actually be worse than Christian's accident and Kyle's injury.
Christian is drinking different water, eating weird foods, and going through other changes. Accidents happen. Watching it happen was hilarious and awful at the same time.
Kyle's injury, on the other hand, was just plain awful. It was a brutal injury to watch. Kyle is such an awesome person and player, and it was so sad to exit this way after winning Survivor 48.
In episode 3, when the three tribes — Kalo, Vatu, and Cila — arrived at the reward challenge, Jeff asks the tribe to give him a beat. Then, Jeff takes viewers on a journey through the art of musical poetry. And, yes, I've transcribed the rap, begrudglingly becaues it wasn't in digital print yet.
"Now, this season's in the hands of the fans,
they're calling the shots, it's out of our hands.
They picked the buffs you're wearing today,
but the rice and supplies, they said no way.
Now it's time to drop another fan vote,
the dangerous kind, this one will cut your throat.
So, are you ready to drop your plans?
Are you ready to drop your hands?
Are you ready to drop bluffs?
because the fans have spoken
and it's time to drop your buffs."
The entire time that Jeff was rapping, I had chills, and it's not like when you hear an amazing singer in person or something like that. No, this was secondhand embarrassment for Jeff. Survivor needs someone to stop these bad ideas. I like it when Jeff goes off the cuff for a reason. I don't need these stilted, rehearsed songs or speeches from Jeff. I need real, authentic instruction and commentary.
And, that's why I love Jeff! He almost always plays it straight. Not so much here. One time, I can forgive. I don't know if I will look past it if it happens again.
Thankfully, All Winners Survivor on Instagram has the clip of Jeff's rap, and you just have to watch it if you haven't seen it yet.
Honestly, I don't know why they did this. Clearly, Jeff walked into the challenge with a plan to share some rhymes with these players. Now, I just want to know who wrote this rap. Who thought this was a good idea? And, lastly, I just hope that it never happens again.
If only we had the On Fire with Jeff Probst podcast to explain what happened here....